I've been finding myself slowly slipping back into the realm of anxiety and depression.
I don't know that "depression" is the right word... I would like to say that its more of a "funk".
I have tried to link everything together as to the cause(s) of this. I have been doing SO well (right, Cory?) for so long! I haven't freaked out in a number of months. (By "freaking out", I mean.... getting totally anxious and nervous and non-stop thoughts spinning and spinning in my brain until I can't take it!!! AHH! -and crying a lot.)
My reasoning behind the current state of Funk... lack of sleep. Lack of TIME (meetings all of the time! AH!). Money. Weight. Future (marriage plans, buying a house, moving away). Work (covering for Receiving while still trying to do Shipping also). My grandma (who is developing dementia). Lack of Prayer/Devotions.
I am trying to fight it... I have felt so good not being enslaved to the torture of my own mind. I ask for your prayers... and also for suggestions of good books. I am a fan of fiction... however, I would REALLY like to find some inspirational/devotionals. Something that isn't too boring in its facts... but is knowledgable and meaningful. Please, drop me a comment if you have any good finds. Reading is an escape for me... and I don't always want it to be an escape into a story. (If you know what I mean?) **Tonya--I promise I will send your book back to you!!!!!**
Anyway... I just read a book called TILT by Elizabeth Burns. It's not a Christian book... which I didn't figure when I bought it. But it looked interesting and I liked the little girls name in the story! It had some disturbing stuff in it - one of the characters suffered from Bipolar and was manic-depressive. I almost feel like that stupid book brought down my defenses on such things.... HOWEVER... the main character of the book mentioned about a "Gratitude Journal". She would write the things she was thankful for throughout the day. Simple things... maybe a song, the way the breeze made the wind chimes sound before a rain, her children, a smile. Sometimes even an event in her life. The thought of it stuck with me. A Gratitude Journal. I've always kept a journal-since I was probably 7 or so. Once I started having really bad anxiety feelings, etc... I stopped journaling... because I didn't want to read back and remember those days. SO... I think I may start one. Do any of you keep a journal? Or maybe a gratitude journal? I lean toward pessimism. I don't know why... I am SO blessed in my life. But I am hoping this will help to pick me up... to bring me closer to God (in keeping the journal as a thank you prayer to Him).
I'm curious as to your thoughts...?