Thursday, September 30, 2010

A Little Disappointed in Myself.

I am one of those people who looks in the mirror and sees thighs that are too big, a stomach that is too round, boobs that could really use a reduction and let's face it... a double chin. Despite whether I can wear a size 8 pair of jeans... (because honestly, I still fit into that other pair of 12's too)... or the fact that I weigh 150 lbs. (pre-pregnancy). I still always just see fat.

When I was trying to get pregnant, I would tell myself that I would accept whatever may come if I could JUST carry a baby. I was annoyed at those pregnant women who would complain about looking like a beached whale. I always just thought they should be happy that they had a life growing inside of them...

Until today.

Up until my last appointment in mid-august or so... I had only gained 4.5 lbs my whole pregnancy (4.5 months). I won't lie... I felt pretty darn good about that. I heard stories of people who gained 15-20 lbs in their first trimester... so I was off to a pretty good start! I had it in the bag! No matter that I felt bigger... I mean, how can you NOT feel bigger with all of the changes going on? But that 4.5 lbs was my marker of achievement!

Today, I went into the doctor's office and stepped on the scale only to be blown away by the number. I have gained 11 lbs since my LAST appointment. That's only a little over a month!!!

It was all I could do to keep it together. And I didn't do that very well.

When the doctor came in... she was like "Whoa!!! That's a lot of weight since your last appointment! You don't want to have to have a C-section!"

I could feel the lump in my throat start to choke me.

How could I let this happen? I felt like such a failure.

Of course, I lost it. Not uncontrollably... but I told her that I was really disappointed in myself. And that I've struggled with my weight my whole life.

We talked about needing to be healthy... but NOTHING tastes good to me. I had a brief reprieve from heartburn for a couple of weeks... but it's starting to come back with avengence. The only semi-relief I have are carbs. I KNOW I've been eating crap... but breads and pastas (ok, and pop tarts... UGH) don't give me that flare of acid that makes me so miserable. I can't eat pineapple or oranges... orange juice, sauces, salsa... even strawberries give me heartburn!

It's no excuse, I know... there are plenty of other foods out there that are healthy... but it's also about motivation. I have been so tired... the last thing I want to do is prepare vegetables for snacks or take the dog for a walk. So, I just don't.

And now I'm paying for it.

I am beyond disappointed in myself... but after calling Cory, I feel a bit better. I am so thankful to have a husband that is willing to work with me! We are going to work together to put our grocery list together with healthy foods... and try to come up with healthy recipes that we'll both enjoy.

Even though I don't feel quite like a "beached whale"... I honestly still don't feel that "big"... I am struggling with body image. It's not as easy as I thought it would be to have the right attitude... but today has been a wake up call. As frustrated as I am in my choices, I am so thankful that the baby is healthy... and now I am determined that we'll both be healthy!

It's not going to be easy.

If anyone has any healthy recipes, I'd greatly appreciate it!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

The Basement... Finally!

Ok, so I know I've mentioned our basement project numerous times over the past couple of months. And I have so many pictures... that instead of boring you with tons of details... I'll just post the pics with a few comments. However, the pics aren't that exciting either. But they show the transformation... and eventually the END product (woo hoo!). So without further ado... here they be.

From the beginning:

There were cracks on the floor... and the walls were awful
(however, Cory and his parents painted on a sealer before the work started... so they don't look too bad)

Our rock wall had to be torn apart...

See the wall behind that jackhammer? Yeah, that's where our
Not even kidding. Luckily, the workers were able to
get it fixed up--or else at some point, our house would
have tilted.

(You could literally tap on the wall and it would crumble!)

Running the drain through the yard to the main hook up.

Getting ready to pour the cement.

We have water pouring off our back hill and there is no way to stop it...
so they put in a french drain .

They also put a drain right out front because water just rolls
off the back hill and down the driveway.

The Floor!

They took out the garage door and blocked up the wall!
We have a new door on there now (that was just a makeshift
door to tide us over for a few days)
... but it needs to be
set and leveled so I don't have pics yet.

My father in law was smart and put mesh over the drain
so that the leaves don't clog it. He even sprayed it with
rustoleum! He thinks of everything!

And... the inside!!
It's not a "finished" basement, but it's a place for us to
store things and keep our exercise bike, laundry area, etc.
(We have yet to get everything back in there and organized
so don't mind the mess!!)

(I'm thinking maybe a little pottery studio in that far corner.. hehe..)

Thanks for dropping by to check out my basement!!
It is SUCH a relief to have it dry and not moldy!

Monday, September 27, 2010

Fall Festival Recap

Every year, I mean to take lots of pictures... every year... I think I take less and less.

Oh well. I'm sure my sister will post about it at some point!


Saturday was the Annual Fall Festival at my sis's in laws Meat Market. My mom and I started off 7 years ago with a booth for pottery. Each year, the pottery has dwindled (pottery is quite the process and it's hard to dedicate time to it when you're busy! Or for me--when you live an hour from the studio!). I have worked on other projects to fill up our table... aaaand, of course... I didn't take any pictures of the table we set up!

It was a beautiful day... the sun was out, the breeze was blowing. Perfect!

Over all, it seemed like a lot of people were looking and not buying. It's kind of frustrating, especially when you put so much work into the stuff you're trying to sell. However, I can relate. I don't have the kind of money to just walk around and freely spend on everything that catches my eye... so it's understandable that some people aren't always ready to spend, spend, spend. Although, I did get quite a few compliments as people browsed the tables!

Here are my nephew (on the top) and his cousin. They are using the steps as a stage and singing into their imaginary microphones!

(That's one of those picture things that you can stick your face in and become a scarecrow, pumpkin or corn cob!)

There is a lady who does Foot Reflexology that comes to give FREE foot massages! I had gotten Cory a gift certificate for his birthday, but he has yet to use it. I persuaded him to go for the free massage to give him a chance to chat with her and of course, enjoy a good foot rub. I don't think he appreciated that I waited until he was comfy in the chair to snag my camera and snap a picture! Haha!

Later on, Cory retreated to the car to nap... and I noticed that my dad had also decided to relax in his tilt bed.

I can't imagine that was comfortable for long!

When we got home, we realized that our faces were sun burnt... which was not pleasant... but I am so thankful that the weather was wonderful and that I did sell a little bit. I am hoping to be able to work on more pottery throughout the next year. We'll see how that goes with a newborn!


I am waiting for the Windshield Repair guy to come to replace the windshield in Cory's car. Yesterday a piece of debris flew off of some guys truck and caused quite the chip... which we watched grow before our eyes as we were driving. *sigh*

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Marshmallow Goodness

Hey Lara,

I took your suggestion and added micro-mini mallows to my Granola Bar Recipe!!

MMMmm MMm Good!

I highly recommend that anyone who loves granola bars, try it!
The recipe is easy!
I put in half of the mini chocolate chips it called for and substituted the rest with the mallows!

(You can find the tiny marshmallows at a bulk food store!)

You won't be disappointed!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Flashback Friday #34

I have put Flashback Friday on hold the past month or so... it's mainly just because I've been lazy about it!

But today, I wanted to flashback a couple of years to the annual Fall Festival that my sister's in-laws host at their meat market!

This is my nephew... I just love this picture!
I'm so glad I took it!

Tomorrow is this year's festival and the weather is supposed to be beautiful!
I'm excited!

Join in the flashback fun over at Christopher&Tia's!

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Happy Fall!!!

It's my 400th post! Woo hoo!!

And according to my calendar, it's the first day of fall!
(And also my sis and her hubs 10th anniversary!)

The other day, some creepy van pulled off the side of the road and was taking pictures toward my house. I'm assuming they were taking pics of our lovely maple tree... otherwise... that's pretty creepy! But it made me curious to go out and look at the tree myself and I decided that I'd like to take a couple of pictures as well.

(I spied a little nest!)

It's amazing what beauty you can miss when you don't pay attention. I don't know how many times I've walked past that tree to go to the mailbox or my car, and never really looked at how beautiful the leaves are as they change! I'm glad I took the time to notice, even if it did take a creepy van to coax me into it!!

I have a lot to do today to get ready for the Fall Festival on Saturday. I am finishing up some envelopes and packaging/pricing what I have. I don't want to wait until the last minute, although I guess you could say this is last minute!! I want to have everything ready tomorrow and put into the car so all we have to do is hop in and start driving!

So far, the weather forecast is calling for beautious weather!
I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it doesn't change!
Last year was SO cold and rainy!

(Boo enjoying the beautiful fall sunshine!)

I hope you all have a wonderful day!
Thanks for stopping by!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

A Sneak Peek into the Basement

I have been planning on posting about our basement project... but just haven't made the time.
I really am going to do it soon though because Cory and his dad just put the new door up... but until then, I thought I'd give you a sneak peek into my laundry area.

It's not anything overly exciting... but it's CLEAN and the floor is NEW. It makes me actually want to do laundry!

Before, there was a BIG gully right where that red rug meets the laundry hampers. Cory's dad had put a piece of metal over it so that we didn't break our ankles by stepping in it when we were down there.

Well... let me just show you one of the Before pictures:

At the very far end... where the drain is, that gully is deep! And notice the yucky cement floor has now turned into a nice, lovely cement floor!! (yea!)

And.... this guy decided to visit...

But quickly was demolished by Cory's shoe.


However, his BIG daddy was hanging around a few days later... and I do mean BIG!
He didn't last long enough to snap a pic (thank goodness!!!!!).

Well, I have to get my day going!
Happy Wednesday!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Oh Happy Day!

Well, here I am... so thankful to be home and healthy!

Last night we had to make a little trip to the ER. It could have potentially been serious... but luckily, everything is OK with me and the wee one.

The only downside was that even though we were the only ones in the ER... it took FOREVER! They were quick to get me into a room... but then the rest of what went on took so long!

But I can't complain.

I got a good report and after some tears of relief, Cory and I were able to head home and get some rest before starting our day today! (I just feel bad for him because he had to go into work early! He's probably pooped!)

Here I am on Sunday... baby is moving up and out at 21 weeks!

(Again, please don't mind my bathroom!)

Well, I have lots to do today to get ready for the Fall Festival this Saturday... as well as some things around the house I need to catch up on!

Happy Tuesday!!

Sunday, September 19, 2010

A Few Things From the Weekend...

Yesterday, Cory and I attended a wedding for one of Cory's coworkers.

We get there and walk in... soft music playing in the background... people talking in hushed tones.

The usher takes my arm and quietly asks, "It's just the two of you?"

He said it so softly that I honestly wasn't sure what he said and it took a second for me to process it and realize that he had asked me a question. And once it "clicked" in my brain... I said, "Yeah!"

When we got to our seat, Cory's face was beet red and he informed me that I had been REALLY loud and people had turned to look at us!


Oh well!! At least I wasn't as obnoxious as the little kids behind us who talked LOUDLY throughout the whole ceremony!!


Last night, we volunteered at The Teen Center since I had booked a couple of bands. We normally provide dinner... so my mom was nice enough to make some potatoes for me to take and I just threw some green beans in a crock pot before the wedding. Combined with the chicken/stuffing casserole brought by another volunteer... it was deeeeelicious! Topped off with chocolate texas sheet cake. I've never had cake so good! MMMMmmm!!!


One of the bands broke up last week and didn't bother to tell me... so they obviously never showed up. (Reeeeaaaallll professional)

The other band... Brightwork... was AWESOME. Super nice guys! They are from Harrisonburg, VA and drove 6 hours to play only to turn around and drive another 6-7 hours to Charlotte to lead worship at church the next morning. I figured they would just play and leave... but they stayed for quite awhile, interacting with the kids. Even though they were asking for a donation for their CD's... they knew most of the kids couldn't afford it and so they graciously handed the CD's out for free. I was really impressed, not only by their music, but by their ministry! I hope they are able to come back soon!

You should check them out!


Today in church... the baby kicked me so hard... it jolted my reflexes and I actually elbowed Cory. It almost felt like I got electrocuted... it was so weird! I had to hold in quite a few giggles! :)



Thursday, September 16, 2010

Recipe: Pecan Praline French Toast Casserole

For the past 9 years or so... since my sister had her first baby... we have gathered at her house on Christmas Morning to open presents and enjoy a very delicious brunch! The menu has varied over the years, but we've settled on a casserole that we just can't pass up!

I'm not sure how Christmas will turn out this year, since I'll be 8 months pregnant... and you just never know about the crazy winter weather in PA. (I don't imagine Cory will want to travel almost an hour on crappy roads with his pregnant wife... we almost didn't make it out last year because the roads were so bad!). However, I have snagged the recipe for the beloved French Toast Casserole... so we can have it WHENEVER we want! And it is SO good!

Guess what we had for dinner last night? :)

You know you want some of this!

I didn't take a bunch of pictures of the process of throwing this together... it's pretty easy... so HERE YA GO:

1 loaf french bread (*this works best because it makes smaller pieces, however you can use whatever bread you want and make it fit in the dish)
8 large eggs
2 c. half & half
1 c. milk
2 T. sugar
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1/4 tsp. cinnamon
1/4 tsp. nutmeg
dash of salt

*Slice bread into twenty 1" slices. Arrange slices in 2 rows in a generously buttered 9x13 pan, overlapping slices and making sure gaps are filled in. (I sprayed the dish with PAM instead of using butter and it worked just fine!)

*In a large bowl, combine eggs, cream, milk, sugar, vanilla, cinnamon, nutmeg and salt. Beat with whisk until well blended. Pour mixture over bread slices, making sure all are covered equally by the mixture and spooning mixture in between the slices.

*Cover tightly and refrigerate overnight. (I made mine in the AM and stuck it in the fridge until I was ready to pop it in the oven for dinner!)

The Next Morning (or later in the day)...

*Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

*Prepare Praline Topping(below) and spread topping as evenly as possible over bread.

*Bake 40 minutes until puffy and golden. (The topping should be crusty, not gooey.)

*Serve with syrup!

Praline Topping:
1/2 lb (2 sticks) butter
1 c. light brown sugar, packed
1 c. chopped pecans
2 T. light corn syrup
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 tsp. nutmeg

*Combine ingredients and mix until butter is crumbly, then spread evenly over bread.

Note: The inside of the casserole will be a bit "egg-y"... but if you get just the right mix of it with the crusty praline topping... it is delicious! Also, I halfed the whole recipe and put it in a smaller dish since it's just the two of us! It was perfect!


Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Imma Beat Down Dat Door!

I woke up this morning to banging and clanking.

Cory was messing with the door handle to our bedroom.

I groggily asked him to "Do that later"... then fell back onto the pillow to continue in my half daze of sleeping.

He didn't stop. Actually, he went to the basement to get a screwdriver to take the darn thing off the door!

Turns out, it was totally busted inside. If he had shut the door (which we normally do to keep the cat out)... I would've been stuck in the bedroom!! The knob just twisted and turned without actually doing anything productive (like latching or unlatching!).

So, I suppose I can forgive him for making all of that noise. Hehe

A little later, I was awakened by the phone ringing.... it was my mom.

Apparently I sounded groggier than I meant to because she knew right away that she'd woken me up! She told me to call back later... but then I was up (you know how that is). We hung up anyway and I went downstairs to check my cell phone. Normally my mom will call on my cell and hang up, then I'll call her back since we have free long distance (well, technically speaking. Nothing is FREE). I wanted to clear the call on my cell but realized she hadn't called on it.

Then I realized.. it was "Searching for Service".... weird.

So I called her back on my house line and asked--thinking her call wasn't showing up on my cell since there was no service. She ended up not having called my cell this ONE time, of all times. But none of that matters... the issue was that I didn't have service.

What was THAT all about?!

Of course, when I got on Facebook... there were plenty of people ranting and raving about not having Verizon Cell service and there are 3 counties without it, etc. So at least I knew I wasn't alone!

But then I got annoyed. I couldn't even text or call Cory at work (we were planning on spending lunch time at the park together today, but never hashed out the details). And service is STILL out! Luckily, Cory came home around lunch time since we didn't have a way to communicate.

Then I realized... THANK GOODNESS I didn't get stuck in our bedroom this morning because of that darn doorknob! If I had, I would have been literally stuck! I wouldn't have been able to S.O.S. to Cory since the only number I have for him at work is his cell (which has no service!)... and I had no phone book to look up his work number! I promptly made him give me his work number in case of emergencies...

But I guess when he gets home, I'll have to thank him for beating on the doorknob while I was sleeping. It was much better than if I would have been stranded in the bedroom for hours without access to the bathroom or food!!!

And Verizon---get your crap together!!!!!

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

A Big Thank You!!

The other day, I opened the mailbox to find a surprise package from my friend, Julie!

(Don't you just LOVE when that happens??)

Lookie at what she made me!
(Ok, technically they are for the baby!)

So cute!
I love them!
Handmade gifts just make me smile!

I had started registering for bibs... but you just can't get something like
this from Walmart or Target!!

Thank You Julie (& Sean)!!

Woo Hoo!!

Monday, September 13, 2010

No Time...

No time to post today... I'm headed out of town till this evening!

Hope you all have a lovely day!!

I gotta jet!

PS--I'm 20 weeks! Halfway! EEK! :)

Friday, September 10, 2010

I'm Working On It!!

I have been working on getting my Baby Registries filled out.

Mostly Target and Walmart since there aren't many other options, at least in these parts.

Diapers will be registered at Green Mountain Diapers (we're doing cloth!). WOOT!

I didn't realize how overwhelming it is to find items for the registry! I mean... I knew about basic things I should register for... but some things, I didn't even give a thought to register for (but my mom encouraged me to add them).

It's a little stressful.

I'm doing it a little at a time, trying to read reviews on most things as I go... which adds to the amount of time I spend on the whole project!!

All of that being said...

Do any of you have suggestions about items I should register for? I'm afraid that I'll forget something!!

Do I register for things like blankets, even though I am hoping I'll get handmade ones? (I WISH ETSY HAD A REGISTRY!!!)

Do I register for toys or just let people get whatever?

What about clothes? I mean... we aren't finding out the gender and there aren't a whole lot of options for neutral. Should I just let people get what they want to get??


Thursday, September 9, 2010

Yesterday Was Beautiful...

... the sun was shining, the clouds were white and fluffy, the breeze was blowing. My idea of perfect weather.

My VW bug needed inspected, so I drove it out to my dad's shop. I was so thankful that it was such a nice day to enjoy the view!

Despite the air blowing in through every crack and crevice in the dashboard, around the radio and, of course, in through the windows that don't quite close all of the way... the temp was just right! I cruised through the hills... really appreciating the beauty all around me.


A HUGE gust of wind came and caught me off guard! It blew so hard that I literally swerved into the other lane of oncoming traffic! Talk about a heart stopper. I was just glad that the semi-truck in the other lane was still far enough away to not cut it too close. SHEESH! Trust me when I say "they don't make 'em like they used to"--however, I can't resist the charm of a 40 yr old VeeDub! So I'm not really complaining! :)

I'm trying to get in my bug driving while I can before it's parked for the winter. I also don't imagine that Cory will approve of me carting a baby around in it next spring/summer. The "tin can" isn't quite safe enough, which is understandable. However, my mom used to haul my sis and me around in a VW bug back in the 80's!! (Although, the car was like 10 yrs old at the time.. haha... Not quite the same anymore).

Anyway... my nephew was at my parents' house yesterday when I stopped in. (I usually stop in to see my mom before heading to the garage). Jaxson just LOVES VW's... and I love that he loves them!

(He is constantly asking me which car I've driven over and why I drove this one and not that one, etc etc... he also hounds my dad about "fixing" my vw camper--without my prodding! He just can't get enough of the VW!).

Well, since the bug had some issues over the summer... Jax finally figured that instead of asking me AGAIN if I'd driven it... he would just let me know that he knew that I didn't...

"I know, you didn't bring your buggy today..." he said while slumping his shoulders.

"Oooooh, reeeaaaally?" I replied with a grin.

He gave me a funny look... then ran over to the window and saw it... where he then started a dramatic display of emotion! Throwing himself on the couch and rolling around with sighs of, "I can't believe it!"... it was quite amusing.

So... from then on, he was OF COURSE riding with ME and not GRAMMIE to the garage. We got the kid seat all situated and him all buckled in. He was just all grins the entire ride.

Later on, we ran to the post office... and then in the afternoon we had to drive to another shop to pick up a part my dad needed for a job he was working on.

The result:

I don't know how he could sleep with as loud as the car is... between the engine and the wind howling in!! Uh... yeah, I need to clean the windows... ick!

It was so nice to know that the beautiful day turned into a happy day for one little guy! And I was happy to be able to give him a reason to smile!

I imagine that one day he will own at least one VW of his own!

Vroom! Vroom!

Oh yeah... and one more thing... check out my windshield washer fluid dispenser:

Ya gotta do what ya gotta do!

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Well, Hello There!

Say "HELLO" to baby!
(Sorry, these are pics of pics because I don't know how to use the scanner! They have a little glare!)

(Face, belly and elbow)

Today was my "20 Week Ultrasound"...
although I'm only 19 weeks.

Little baby was looking good!
Measuring right and moving all about!

(Those are the arms and belly... the head is back behind the arms)

"Put 'em up!"

After a 30 minute wait with a full bladder...
Cory and I were thrilled to watch this little life on
the screen right before our very eyes.
It truly is a blessing!

This is my fav pic!

Too cute!

Oh... and by the way... we didn't find out the gender! Maybe I should do a poll! :)

Now I'm off to make cookies for my Father-in-Law. We totally, absolutely, 100% forgot his birthday... which was a week ago. We feel like such SHMUCKS!
So I am going to bust out the best raisin filled cookies EVER to try to ease my conscience!

I just can't believe we forgot.. ugh!

Monday, September 6, 2010

Early Christmas!!

Well, you may have read my post from the other day about needing some sort of rocking chair for when the baby comes. I have been kind of up in the air on how to approach it.

Cory and I were trying to decide if we should invest in just some sort of rocker/recliner for our living room to go with what we already have... or perhaps, if the price was right, invest in a whole living room set. (The one we have now was given to me a number of years ago when I moved into my first house)

Since Cory had the day off for Labor Day, we decided to take a drive to a couple of places and check things out just to see.

At the first store, I was a little discouraged.

Cory prefers to have recliners IN the sofa. We don't have that right now... if we want to prop our feet up, we drag over the ottoman from the one chair. So... the condition was... I could pick out the furniture, as long as it had recliners in it.

Seriously. All of the reclining furniture just gives me a flashback to my great grandparents house. And it is all over-stuffed... which is uncomfortable for someone short like me, whose neck doesn't reach right... and my head ends up being tilted forward instead of comfortably resting back!

We walked through the first store and saw absolutely nothing.

We went to the next store... and it was much of the same type of styles. I had an idea in my head of what I wanted... it was just a matter of finding it with the reclining function!!

Wouldn't ya know it... maybe 5 minutes into the second store... I saw it!

A sofa and love seat set... both with recliners... and they weren't the over stuffed, poofy style!

I was excited, but Cory talked me into looking around the rest of the store. Plus, we really were hoping to find a rocker/recliner that matched. There wasn't one in the set display.

After browsing the rest of the store, we caught up with the sales lady and I showed her which set we liked and explained that we were hoping to get a rocker/recliner as well. Wouldn't ya know... she led us RIGHT to a matching one in the recliner section! WOO HOO!

The next thing I knew, we were looking at fabrics and pillow options... she left Cory and I to talk it over... and HO, HO, HO... MERRY CHRISTMAS to US! We purchased our first set of living room furniture today!! (It's our expensive Christmas present to each other... maybe for a few years.. haha!)

Here's a pic from my cell phone of what it looks like... however, we chose a brown thin-whale corduroy with some different pillows.

I am nervous about the brown... we went with a darker brown because we were afraid that the lighter browns would clash with the carpeting. Our walls are a light green... and the pillows we chose should tie the walls, carpet and sofas all in together. At least I'm hoping!!

So, in 6-8 weeks... I shall be unveiling pictures of my living room! And I am SO excited!

And it turns out, that we are able to give our current furniture to a friend who is in need... so it works out wonderfully!!

Yea for new furniture!!! Now... to pick out a crib...

Friday, September 3, 2010

Bigger Than I Thought... Crazier Than I Expected

I haven't been chronicling my growing belly. Honestly, I haven't really been showing until recently. I can still kind of hide it depending on my clothes...

However, this morning I thought I'd take a pic to send to some of my family that lives far away... and... well... I guess I'm bigger than I thought I was!

18.5 wks
(Please excuse my bathroom... lol!)

It is still sinking in for me that I am going to be a mom. I just recently felt the baby move for the first time on Sunday... and last night, the baby was moving a lot... which was kind of fun. But it still almost doesn't feel real. Yeah, I've been experiencing most of the symptoms... but once I felt the baby move, it was like a reality check.

There really is something in there!

I have struggled with anxiety in the past. Can you believe that I would actually get myself worked up over time? Wasting time... Time moving too fast... Not enough time... I could go on if I really thought about it. When Cory and I met, I knew in my heart that he was the one for me... we actually got engaged only a couple of months later, only for me to break it off because of panic (the whole "time" issue)... and it took me 4 years to walk down the aisle. Not because I didn't want to... I desperately wanted to! But I would get it in my head that the sooner I got married, the faster life would seem to go. Counting birthdays is hard enough, but adding anniversaries... torture!! I mean, on our 5 year anniversary... I'll be 30! Who wants to be THIRTY yet!?

I know... I sound like a psycho!

Slowly, I have overcome most of this mind-rambling nonsense. With lots of prayer, let me tell you.

But suddenly... I've found it creeping back in.

I'm having a baby! I'm going to practically stop marking the milestones in my own life... because I will be counting his/her Christmases and birthdays. When my child turns 5... I'll be 32! My mom and dad will be 56!

Instead of enjoying each moment as they happen... I panic about things going too fast.

It's a big flaw I have been able to suppress the past few years, after fighting it for a long time. Though it looks like the battle will be raging again!

I'm just hoping it's my hormones making me crazy this time!

If you're a praying person, please send up a little prayer for this mama to calm her anxious heart! I am hoping and praying that the closer it comes to my due date and my belly gets even bigger... the more peace I will find to enjoy life as it happens!!

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Gearing Up...

At the end of this month, I will be setting up a table at a Fall Festival that my sister's in-laws host at their meat market. This will be the 7th year!!

In previous years, my mom and I have set up a table with our pottery. The past couple of festivals, though, we haven't had the time to be in the studio (especially me since I live 50 mins away now!). I am a little disappointed. I so much enjoy making pottery and seeing the uniqueness of each piece as it is pulled from the kiln after firing. I enjoy seeing the reactions of the people who see our pottery and appreciate it for it's handmade goodness. Just knowing that someone chooses a mug or bowl to display or use in their own home gives me such satisfaction!

But alas, this year will once again not have our pottery for sale.


So... in the mean time, I have been trying to work on other projects. Unfortunately, I have a short attention span (unless I'm reading a really good book!) and I have a bit of a mish mash of items. That doesn't make for a very appealing table... but I'm doing my best!

Most recently, my days have been filled with envelope making. There is just something about sending or receiving a note or letter in a funky envelope! It makes me happy!

Now... if only other people think the way I do.... (I guess I'll find out at the fest!)

We are Steeler People around these parts... so I thought I'd try to appeal to some people with these Steeler Envelopes made from a book that chronicled the year they won "One for the Thumb!"--woot!

I also started packaging some of my envelopes and putting labels on them (using my vintage typewriter--I must admit, it's been fun!).

Is it weird that I like to package the envelopes more than I like making them? Maybe it's just the satisfaction of having a finished product! haha!

Last year's festival was cold and rainy. We're hoping this year we will be beautiful and full of sunshine!!